Interview w/Steve Brennan

Steve Brennan (left) is a regular around Newcastle card rooms, as well a frequent NPF poster who is very well liked across the local poker scene.

Steve kindly agreed to be FTP’s first guest of 2011, giving us all a great insight into his thoughts and diamond funny personality. So welcome aboard mate I’m delighted to have you and hope all my readers enjoy going in the tank with Steve “fatfish” Brennan.

DT “When and how did you get started playing poker? Did you have any inspirational poker players, books, moments, shows, etc. that were instrumental for you?.”

SB “I started getting interested in poker when I caught an edition of late night poker on channel 4, I think it was probably about 12 years ago. I watched it not having a clue what was going on but loved it amongst all the confusion. Looked up the rules so I understood what was going on then ended up buying loads of poker books, I think I read Doyles book first. Played online for a bit then went to Circus where I was on Steven Liu's table and he was on the episode of late night poker I watched. I remember I bricked it so much I was shaking when I put me big blind in. Still won the bastard like.”

DT “Your NPF screen name is fatfish, how did this come to fruition? Do you have any other nicknames?.”

SB “For some reason Steven Liu thought I was overweight and shit, hence the fatfish. It just stuck from there. He still calls me it now, just as a good read not because he knows its my nickname or out. Other nicknames now appear to be Brenda, which is awesome because who doesn't love being called a woman's name all day long. I also get called an arse hole a lot but I'm not sure what people mean by that.”

DT “Who would play you in a Hollywood film about your life?.”

SB “Oliver Reed would have been a good one but he's not chiselled enough so I'll go with Clint.”

DT “I understand your affiliate with TEAMDOBBS, tell us a bit about that? Are you finding it’s helping with your development as a player?.”

SB “Just before last years forum game I think the Dobbas were short for some reason so DC invited me and Andy Blair in and I loved it, was my first team game and it was great crack. Very chuffed to be a Dobba as we are definitely the No.1 team up here despite the Sensations miraculous one off luck box win. Having said that, I'm definitely a much worse player now as I seem to have turned into a hideous nit and I don't think I've won a tourney since I joined. So in short, delighted to be a Dobba despite it completely and utterly ruining my game.”

DT “If I looked inside your refrigerator what would I find?.”

SB “Alison's on holiday so a quick check revealed some ham that I couldn't get through with a knife, some cheese, 3 ice pops and a car radio.”

DT “Ifrikher Ali, genius or moron?.”

SB “Any man that can turn a brand new kalooki deck into a deck so rigged you would need an explosives team to diffuse them in a space of 5 minutes while still in full view of everyone is a genius. I'm pretty sure he has sandpapered his thumb to make the skin rough so he can insta-mark the jokers. He also has superpowers of being able to look directly at you, yet somehow his line of vision travels round your head and sees your cards and at the same time hiding the aces in his pants with his toes. Just a remarkable man. If I get a phone call from him during the week just for a friendly chat, I instantly lock the doors and avoid circus like the plague because I know some hi-tech scam is in operation to do me out of 20 quid. A very talented individual.”

DT “June 2010 you were involved in a prop bet which prevented you from shaving, cutting your hair, and changing your clothes for a month. How did this turn out? Who bet against you? How much action did you sell?.”

SB “Ah yes, this turned out well. Ian Robson the dealer from circus made this bet with me for £100 quid which I snapped off, well aware of the fact it wasn't going to affect my hygiene cycle too greatly. A pair of trainers, jeans, a wrecked t shirt and the hairy hat, with no washing or shaving. Unfortunately I had forgotten all about the wedding and 2 court cases I had to attend during the time period. The 2nd court case in particular was a débâcle as I attempted to represent myself in court over a speeding fine while looking like Uncle Albert from Only Fools And Horses. After a display in court than the judge described as "questionable" he doubled my points and multiplied my fine x8. He know he was wrong though. Safe in the knowledge I could pay some of the £600 fine with the £100 from Robson he then told me he wasn't going to pay me because he didn't particularly fancy it. Ended up getting £50 quid.”

DT “Without the incentive of a prop bet, do you shower weekly or monthly normally?.”

SB “I like the way there wasn't an option for more than once a week here, weekly then.”

DT “Favourite rubdown?.”

SB “Pipe get blurted out a lot. So, pipe then. I know a lot of pipes.”

DT “Are you in a relationship with Alison because she has big tits?.”

SB “Yes.”

DT “What’s your biggest achievement in poker?.”

SB “Much like my life in general I haven’t really achieved a great deal. Playing the WSOP main events was an awesome experience. Much like everything though I was burdened with hideous luck. First year my table had Eric Lindgren, David Williams, that full tilt guy with a tash who's name I cant remember but he looks a bit like that bloke off Last Of The Summer Wine who was always knobbing Marina, and Mike Caro who proceeded to tell me I was the target as soon as I sat down, which was nice. The second year I turned up only to be told I was playing the day before and had blinded out. After an incredible debate involving the card room manager, me, a megaphone and eventually security. I was bought in again as the final alternate but by that time I was so annoyed I'd got mashed at the bar and cant really remember anything. Probably the thing I'll remember the most from poker was a tourney I was playing in Estonia. Busted early but the pints were 19p so I was perfectly fine with that. My flight back home was at 6am in the morning so I thought well I'll never get up in time for that if I go to bed so I'll just stop at the bar until its time to go. Got a taxi at 5am and boarded the plane fine, always good when a plan comes together. Went to sleep immediately and woke up just as the plane was landing, just absolutely perfect timing. Hopped off and went to get me bags, which didn't turn up. Looked up at the signs to make sure I was at the right carousel only to find everything was written in hieroglyphics. I turned to the guy next to me and asked him just where the dickens I was. He looked at me like I was retarded and declared I was in Sweden. Following a very very confusing debate with some of the airport staff I was whisked into a back-room and interrogated over being a terrorist, complete with me pants off and the ever present feeling they were going to peek up me back door for a bomb. Just an all round lump of awesome and something I'm very proud of.”

DT “Favourite movie?.”

SB “Usual suspects. Also, anything involving time travel. I'm heavily into time travel at the minute.”

DT “If you only had six months to live, what would you do with the time?.”

SB “Travel around, there’s so many places I would like to see. Would stop in in Vegas as well, just a fantastic place. Mind I say all this but if it actually happened I probably couldn’t be arsed and would just end up in the G complaining about the Bulmers.”

DT “You've been receiving late night phone calls lately, all of which are about someone claiming to have done things with your girlfriend which are illegal in some parts of the world. Do you think this is connected to anyone in the poker community?.”

SB “Unfortunately, there are people in all walks of life who are unable to behave in a civilized manner and like in most things, I believe alcohol plays a large part in the culprits behaviour. I believe the culprit may indeed be from the poker community, I'm looking for someone who goes nuts on the drink and has few morals. The net is closing in.”

DT “Have you lied at any point in this interview?.”

SB “Probably loads. I'm never 100% certain if I'm actually telling the truth or not.”

DT “What does 2011 hold for Steve Brennan? Can we expect to see you frequenting the local tournaments whilst also travelling further a field for some UK festivals.

SB “Probably just the same, playing local once a week or so then playing any bigger games I fancy. I have a particular fondness for DTD, I think its a great place to play poker in.”

Amusing anecdote
Steve and I have shared several drunken ace nights out, I could actually list about five or six profane anecdote's involving us two off the top of my head. One afternoon we were over at the Grosvenor for the CGK cup, both well served after hitting up the bars early morning before getting to the Grosvenor. Steve decides he need's to take a shit, under any normal circumstances he would have went to the guys room and came back with his load lightened. On this occasion though, I thought it would be appropriate to follow him and burst through the door whilst he is busy and continue to watch until he was done. It was quite a special viewing actually, just missing some popcorn ;-).

Steve “fatfish” Brennan ladies and gentleman, not just an ace poker player but absolute first class hilarious lad who I'm delighted to know. Can't wait for the next night on the tile's mate, but maybe we should look to behave ourselves at least a little (in fact M'EH that would be no fun). Thanks for the time and effort Steve, I'm sure all FTP followers will find it a great read.


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